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Relationships & Dating

Keeping Relationships Fresh

You may be in a relationship that’s stood the test of time, but even when two people love each other, the relationship can start to feel stale.

You’ve lived through flower power and sexual liberation, and perhaps even read The Joy of Sex when it first came out in 1972. Maybe you feel like you’ve seen it all, done it all, and tried it all as a couple, and the excitement of your younger years has fizzled. You know each other’s stories so well, you can each finish them for the other. But there are some ways you can remind yourselves why you decided to commit to the relationship for the long haul. They’re not difficult to do.They just involve love, caring, and a little bit of clever thinking.

Rather than just telling stories, recreate a meaningful experience you shared together. You can do this using any of the senses. Visit the place where you became engaged. Eat the same foods you ate when you were stranded at that gas because of the flat tire you got on your way to at concert. Listen to old music that reminds you of a happy time in your relationship. The journey back in time may reignite the feelings you felt at that point in your relationship. At the very least, it’s a chance to talk and laugh about old times. It can be a lot of fun reliving those memories and recalling why you fell in love in the first place.

With some thought, you can plan a pleasant surprise for your partner by thinking about what they value most, whether material or immaterial, and plan an activity or locate that special item. This could be something as large as a surprise vacation to the region of Ireland your wife’s family is from, to a funny garden gnome. An unexpected gesture can play to how well you know your partner and show how much you care.

Every day, try to make a small gesture to let your partner know you love them. Leave surprise love notes between the pages of a book they’re reading or plan a couples massage. These small but significant acts will help to keep the relationship fresh, and be continuous reminders of how you really feel.

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